Christmas thoughts

Daffodil 20 days ago

7 replies

The Christmas period can be especially hard for those living with a terminal illness, caring for someone, or those who are bereaved, whether recently or a while ago. It can feel very lonely and isolating, and yet there are so many who have this experience at the moment (including myself). I would therefore like to open this thread as an invitation for sharing thoughts and memories.

LauraMC1 20 days ago

Thank you so much for this Anke. I agree Christmas can be really hard when you are in these situations.

In recent years I have found it easier to start new traditions with my own children whilst also keeping traditions of my Mum's alive even if it is a small thing like hanging tinsel round all the picture frames.

We always do a special toast on Christmas Day to those loved ones who are no longer with us and I put time aside to visit my parents grave with some Christmas flowers.

Thinking of everyone who is struggling this Christmas.
Laura (member of the Information and Support Team)

Daffodil 20 days ago

Thank you very much for sharing your new traditions, Laura! Merging your Mum's traditions with your own, as a mother, sounds absolutely lovely. The toast on Christmas Day makes your celebrations special, and you also find time for yourself and the memory of your parents when visiting their grave.

Your special toast reminded me of a tradition established by a local church: a pre-Christmas service dedicated to those who are no longer with us. It offers an hour of peace, reflection, quiet carols, and the lighting of candles, and is rather popular. I found it a lovely way to be by myself, with my own thoughts and memories, in a special setting amidst many, many others who are there to do the same.

Joining you in thinking of everyone who is struggling this Christmas,

Anke

Yvonne1 18 days ago

I wholeheartedly agree with your comments Ladies, Christmas can be a very difficult time for all sorts of reasons.  For the recently bereaved it is especially hard to summon up the energy or enthusiasm to celebrate even in the most modest way.

Its a time of reflection, and I guess "what might have been" if our loved ones were still with us.  I found it helpful to just recall what brought joy and happiness to my family and whilst I can`t replicate everything, just doing a little of the old traditions - hanging the meaningful baubles on the tree, making time in the lead up to Christmas just to reflect on all the good times (whether short or long) and sharing stories with others keeping memories alive.

It may be a lonely time but by reaching out to close friends and family means that you are never alone.  Its good to talk always.

May I take this opportunity to wish all our Community Volunteers a very Merry Christmas and a happy and healthy 2026.

Yvonne1

Jenny91 17 days ago

Absolutely, such a vital and thought provoking post. I find at Christmas particular, a time of reflection and remembrance of ones we've lost. I read somewhere that grief is 'having love with no home'. It can be particular difficult at this time. I find lighting a candle and spending a moment to remember the loved one, helps. Only a small sentiment but quite powerful.

I hope anyone reading this knows how much support there is out there and to remember, you are not alone.

Best wishes.

LauraMC1 17 days ago

Thanks so much to you all for your thoughtful posts.

I love the idea of lighting a candle in remembrance and the saying grief as love with no home is so apt.

I agree that having some quiet reflection time can be really helpful at Christmas. It can be hard to make this time for ourselves when there are so many demands and different things going on. I often find a walk by myself can help a lot and if you can, maybe see some time to reflect as a gift you can give to yourself at what can be such a challenging time of year. 

For anyone who is struggling and feels a listening ear would help then please know you are welcome to ring our Support Line on 0800 090 2309. Lines are open over Christmas.

Warmest wishes,
Laura (member of the Information and Support Team)